All Time Top Five Television Game Shows

Apropos of nothing, today is the All Time Top Five Television Game Shows.

5) Family Feud - Survey says, pretty good show. Okay, that was a lame joke, but let's be honest--the real measure of a game show is if it holds your attention when you're flipping channels on a random Wednesday afternoon. And I think Family Feud does that. Bonus points for taking such an inane and arbitrary concept—we randomly interviewed 100 random folks in a completely unscientific fashion, and YOU have to guess what they said—and somehow making it not just watchable, but…well, okay, just watchable I guess. But that’s still something, right?

4) Debt – This is admittedly an obscure choice. Debt ran on Lifetime for a couple of years in the late 90s, and, to be honest, I’m not even sure how I even knew enough to watch it (I’ll blame my Mom for watching crappy Lifetime movies of the week). I do know, however, that even as a teenager I was able to answer most of the pop-culture oriented questions, and it was a cool concept (people who’d recklessly racked up a bunch of debt where given a chance to have the slate wiped clean, courtesy of the always likeable game show veteran Wink Martindale). What really puts it over the top though, was that the winner—once they’d already been made debt-free—has a chance to then win the amount of their debt in cash by answering a question on any pop-culture subject of their choice. The catch? If they get it wrong they’re right back where they started. In heaps of debt and ugly. Well, maybe not ugly, but probably. And definitely in heaps of debt.

3) Who Wants to Be a Millionaire – What can I say? I liked the concept. I love trivia, and the fact that the questions got harder as the winnings went up was a good idea. Fastest finger was fun too. Of course, this only refers to the original nightly version with Regis Philbin—even though I’m no big Regis Philbin fan, I just can’t stand Meredith Viera. I’m always shocked when staying home sick from work and flipping channels and finding that it’s still on. It loses points for inspiring all kinds of awful knockoffs though—from ‘Weakest Link’ to the insufferable ‘Deal or No Deal’ (which makes me long for days when game shows actually involved a modicum of skill).

2) The Price is Right – Yes, I know it’s basically a marketing vehicle for a bunch of shitty products. And yes, I’m aware that the only people who watch this show are old people and college students. And yes, I also think it’s bullshit that it’s closest without going over, leading people to basically just cheat and go $1 over what the person before them picked for a price on said shitty product. But, well…I buy shitty products, I was a college student once and with a little luck I’ll be an old person someday, and…I really can’t excuse that last one, but some people say it’s a strategy. So, in short, The Price is Right is the second best game show ever, though I can’t help but wonder how it will fare when Bob Barker retires later this year. The end of an era.

1) Jeopardy – The granddaddy of ‘em all. Sure, the questions are hard as hell. Yes, Alex Trebek—while strangely likable—is also something of a smug jerk. And yes, all the contestants are nerds. But come on—how good do you feel when you get a question right and one of those nerds misses it? Besides, it’s a pop-culture fixture, the most recognizable game show on the planet. That counts for something, I think.

Just missing the cut: Wheel of Fortune (come on, it's just Hangman!), Let's Make a Deal (what's behind door #3? A goat? Oh, bull*&$#!), Double Dare (lost significant points for the ubiquitous Family Double Dare, which pretty much took the place of regular Double Dare), and Remote Control (Pros: launched the career of Colin Quinn. Cons: Launched the career of Colin Quinn.)